Hanky-Panky and 35 Million Dollars

Mark Hurd is the latest victim of Hanky-Panky - devastating, contagious condition which tends to hit high-ranking business men and politicians across the world. Mark's condition, with it's side effects causing uncontrollable urge to file false receipts, got so bad that he had to resign from his lucrative COE position.

<--- Christine Keeler: "Discretion is the polite word for hypocrisy."
(Note that *copy* of Arne Jacobsen chair!)

Luckily Mark got a compensation (USD 35 Million plus - in cash, stock and options) which should pay for the cure.

Mooses is sure Mark will recover from his Hanky-Panky and will be able to return to a similar position in another organisation in no time. Marks's wife seems to not care too much, and has opted not to comment the condition of her poor, filthy rich husband. Maybe Mark is secretly going for politics? Political environment IS more forgiving to his condition. Hanky-Panky has hit many significant politicians in the past but they all survived with flying colours. Hanky-Panky is widespread and better understood male-nuisance within political groups, and does not often carry such unimportant background burdens like "code of conduct" or "ethics".



<--- Mark Hurd: "I think you'll see us trying to be more precision-oriented in terms of who we partner with."

   Jodie Fisher: "I have resolved my claim with Mark privately, without litigation, and I do not intend to comment on it further." --->

Find Jodie´s Filmography at:  IMDb

Gloria Allred's law firm states: "At Allred, Maroko & Goldberg, we believe the best method for effecting social change after experiencing harassment or discrimination is to expose the violation and inflict real, financial damages on the offender. This is often the only way to ensure that the offense is corrected and never repeated."

<--- Gloria Allred: "There was no affair and no intimate sexual relationship between our client and Mr. Hurd."

FoxNews comments this condition vividly: "Political sex scandals have become so common that it's almost cliché to point out that fact every time another one breaks. But for those who would like their memories jogged, FoxNews.com has compiled a brief retrospective on members of Congress who have gotten caught in recent years fooling around with aides, acquaintances and others who are not their spouses."

Enjoy at:

Political Sex Scandals of Congress

<--- Bill Clinton: "I did not have sexual relationships with that woman"

Monica Lewinsky: "It was a mutual relationship."--->

 

John Profumo: “There was no impropriety whatsoever

in my acquaintanceship with Miss Keeler.” -->

 

Mooses says: Hmmmm...

Facial Deep Cleansing for Men

A friend of Mooses, Emil, asked the other day during a Barbeque afternoon on Playa de Nassau: "What do you use for deep cleansing your face?" He is such an educated and modern man, this friend of mine, and managed to get 100% attention of everybody around the table with his question. That triggered some intensive exchange of thoughts, particularly due to Mooses's recommendation of using Clinique for such an essential maneuver, and Milano´s reaction about Clinique using animal testing for their products.

Anyhow, the best Facial Deep Cleansing for men is done as follows, by using Clinique´s products.

Clarifying Lotion Nr. 2.

Wipe your dirty little face with the lotion twice a day. Use some cotton or even better, a facial pad with a rougher, netted side for extra exfoliating effect.

Face Scrub

Scrub your face once, twice a week. For a better effect, leave it on after the scrub-scrub for a few moments before rinsing off. Works miracles before parties!

Klaar is Kees, Emil!

The claim about animal testing made Mooses think - how do they test a face scrub on animals? Do they rub bunny bottoms with it? No, that would not work, too much fuzzy hair involved, need to be a hairless creature. A rat, a mouse, perhaps? No, too hairy as well...

Baby rats could work - imagine those shiny, spotless baby rats polished with Face Scrub! Pretty enough to hang on a Christmas Tree! If you train them well, you can gently shake the tree and they squeak "Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells" to the sheer joy of the little children gathered around the tree.

A Jingle-Bell-BabyRat --->

But now you know the secret for proper male facial cleansing! Be spotless!

Mooses says: For moisturising, from Biotherm Homme

Age Fitness Daily Anti-Aging Facial Moisturizer

For emergency situations, like morning-after:

High Recharge Daily Anti-Fatigue Moisturizer

PS. Clinique tells: "We do not conduct animal testing on our products or ingredients, nor ask others to test on our behalf, except when required by law. We evaluate our finished products in clinical tests on volunteer panels." Mooses volunteers!

Mooses's Gay Parade Recipe: Grilled Bratwurst

1 Bratwurst, preferably from an animal friendly butcher, gay or bi or hetero will do, per person
1 Grill, loaded with charcole, lit
Protection (Note: not only the grill is hot!)

Beer, Mustard and BBQ Sauce for serving.

Place the sausage(s) on the grill grid. Turn every minute or so checking even browning. Do not poke with fork! When the juices emitted by the sausage turn clear (not pink) you´re done. Serve to the hungry, drunken bastards waiting...

Mooses says: Germans enjoy Cheese with Music as well.

Swimsuits Galore

Swimming´s governing body FINA just announced that the hyper-modern polyurethane and other super-material swisuits are banned from swimming competitions. Jadajadajada! I would be OK if they ban having a propeller stuck up the swimmer´s arses, but making so much fuzz abut the swimsuit materials is soooo boring.

So good bye artificial shark skin and sking-tight plastics! The new rules include a statement that "Scientists" will define what "textile" or "fabric" means. So now we need scientists to define all that? Let's check Wikipedia... "A textile is a flexible material consisting of a network of natural or artificial fibres often referred to as thread or yarn. Yarn is produced by spinning raw wool fibres, linen, cotton, or other material on a spinning wheel to produce long strands.^[1] Textiles are formed by weaving, knitting, crocheting, knotting, or pressing fibres together (felt)."

Well, that did not hurt much, did it? So it´s the "network of fibres" that counts, I´d say.

This gives me a golden opportunity to start crocheting luvely olympic swimsuits by hand. Adding cute flower decorations and intricate patterns will make them unique, and entertaining for the audience as well!

Swim with Moi! --->

One could go 50's - very elegant, not too revealing but giving a clear statement and adoring the physique....

Or Marvel - nothing beats clean cut Spiderman Trunks!

Or Victorian - safe and sound!

But best would naturally be:
Go Marilyn!

Pussy Galore, then again, is a Bond Girl.
She never appeared in a swimsuit.
Or naked, to that matter.

But with a gun.





Mooses says: Skinnydipping is IN! Guns are OUT!